Monday, May 11, 2009

Searching for a Pattern

I want a new sweater pattern to knit. [Thanks, Warrior Knitter!] I've made two sweaters in the past six months. A pretty purple one for The Baby [her favorite color] and a really nice beige one for two-legged Dear Son. I have yarn to make The Boy a green sweater [his favorite color ] but have to figure out how to enlarge the pattern - really, really enlarge it - before I start knitting it. I will make one for DH as well, but need to be able to find the right yarn. He doesn't wear wool. At all. So I will have to find just the right cotton yarn for his sweater. A couple days ago I was searching for a wrap-around sweater pattern - has to be fairly easy - no intricate cabling or stuff like that - and I want it to be long - knee length or longer. Found a site that has free patterns, and didn't find the sweater I want to make for myself, but found this [I should have known better than to click - the name of the sweater, alone, said it all - what was I thinking?!?]. I'm not posting it on my blog. It is just too absolutely f'ng hideous to grace these pages, here. Warning: Click at your own risk. It will hurt your eyes. I want to know what kind of person would wear it! Never mind. No. I don't either. But then I found a joke at UrbanGrounds which made me laugh - and who doesn't feel good after a laugh!

*Little Johnny Meets Barack Hussein Obama*

Barack Hussein Obama was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the president if he would like to lead the discussion on the word ‘tragedy.’ So our illustrious president asked the class for an example of a ‘tragedy.’

One little boy stood up and offered: ‘If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy.’

‘No,’ said Obama, ‘that would be an accident.’

A little girl raised her hand: ‘If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy.’

‘I’m afraid not,’ explained Obama. ‘That’s what we would call great loss.’

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Obama searched the room. ‘Isn’t there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?’

Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said: ‘If the plane carrying you and Mrs. Obama was struck by a ‘friendly fire’ missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy.’

‘Fantastic!’ exclaimed Obama. ‘That’s right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?’

‘Well,’ says the boy, ‘It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn’t be a great loss…and it probably wouldn’t be an accident either.’


Thank you, Robbie Cooper.

Ah ha! Found one. I can make it knee length. Looks easy enough for a beginning knitter. [Have to knit if I am sitting. Cannot just sit and watch tv at night - drives me crazy - and am trying to read and knit at the same time, as well. My Mom can do it. Others can. Surely, I can.]

5 comments:

  1. I have been reading your blog for about a year now. I know its none of my business, but it would be definitely be interesting to read why you hate the Obamas so much. Being a foreigner in the United States, all my American friends and acquaintances are in favor of Obama. It would interesting to read why some people think otherwise. Thanks

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  2. Okay that sweater is just hideous. I almost lost my breakfast.
    And thank you Robbie Cooper from me also. Settled the breakfast back down.
    SS, I will speak only for myself. I do not like our current president or his wife. I have a real problem with the head of our government taking the money I work hard for and giving it to someone who haas never held a job and does not want to hold a job. I have a problem with the policies he is trying to bully through that will destroy the freedoms of my country my grandfather, my father, my brother, and now my sons fight to defend. I have a problem with a government head that wants to label me a 'terrorist threat' because I disagree with abortion on demand, because I attend church and believe in God, because I believe in personal responsibility and accountability. And I have a problem with a woman who got to the position she has by affrimative action but has 'never been proud of America' UNTIL her husband got elected president.

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  3. Thanks for the compliment and blog link. Have you posted photos of the two you did? Did I miss them?

    I like the style of the one that's up next. You've gone beyond me. I have finished one and I have another one the needles. I have sleeve problems that I could solve if I'd just sit down and deal with it.

    On BHO from the 1st commenter? OMG! Where do you start? And, BTW thanks for the warning. I don't listen very well and now I need some serious eye and brain bleach. BLECH!! Could be worse, I suppose. It could have been the Mrs. (ducking and covering!)

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  4. OMG - I just clicked on that link and threw up a little in my mouth.

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  5. You could make the Obama sweater then rip it out, over and over again. Or I just might make it as a toilet seat cover. Or Kitty litter box cover. To use as a shammie? The possibilities are endless!

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